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Break Your Little Heart
I think I am a little sick and demented. I actually want to get my heart broken. Torn to shreds actually. I want to lay on my bed in the fetal position with tears streaming down my face because someone has crushed my heart. I have no idea why I want this. Wanting to be in massive amounts of emotional pain is totally crazy--I completely realize this...yet this is exactly what I want. I have a hunch that I have some bad dating karma coming my way so maybe I just want to get it out of the way so I can move on. Or maybe I want to know that I there is the possibility that I could be really crazy about someone. If I had been blogging about my dating life over the past couple years I would have recounted dozens of first dates with relatively decent guys that I had no desire to date again (I don't even want to get started on the ones that weren't decent!). I think there may have been one guy that I actually would have gone out with a second time...but as luck would have it that was the one guy that didn't want to go out with me again. Oh yeah...there was also Motocross Boy. I would have gone out with him again...but that was more about stroking my ego than dating a person who would have been compatible. After all, what 31 y/o single mom wouldn't be flattered to go out with a good looking 22 y/o? But then again, what 31 y/o single mom could actually hold the attention of a good looking 22 y/o? I certainly wasn't up for that task. So anyway....my point is this: where the hell is a guy that I can be crazy about? I have a suspicion that I may have already met him. It might be Vegas Boy...which is a little terrifying.
Vegas Boy is a guy from high school that I had a massive crush on my senior year. We reconnected in April (thanks to Facebook) and he came down to see me in May. Just the thought of him transports me back to high school and I can feel the same exact feelings I had for him. Wanting a boy that didn't want me back. That was the story of my life back then. At any rate, this guy has something that grabs a hold of me and just won't let go. Maybe it's his sex appeal, maybe it's his personality, his quirks, his laugh, his smile, the way he looks at me...ugh. I think it might just be everything about him. If someone has the ability to break my little heart--it is definitely Vegas Boy. You haven't heard the last about him....I can promise you that!
I think I am a little sick and demented. I actually want to get my heart broken. Torn to shreds actually. I want to lay on my bed in the fetal position with tears streaming down my face because someone has crushed my heart. I have no idea why I want this. Wanting to be in massive amounts of emotional pain is totally crazy--I completely realize this...yet this is exactly what I want. I have a hunch that I have some bad dating karma coming my way so maybe I just want to get it out of the way so I can move on. Or maybe I want to know that I there is the possibility that I could be really crazy about someone. If I had been blogging about my dating life over the past couple years I would have recounted dozens of first dates with relatively decent guys that I had no desire to date again (I don't even want to get started on the ones that weren't decent!). I think there may have been one guy that I actually would have gone out with a second time...but as luck would have it that was the one guy that didn't want to go out with me again. Oh yeah...there was also Motocross Boy. I would have gone out with him again...but that was more about stroking my ego than dating a person who would have been compatible. After all, what 31 y/o single mom wouldn't be flattered to go out with a good looking 22 y/o? But then again, what 31 y/o single mom could actually hold the attention of a good looking 22 y/o? I certainly wasn't up for that task. So anyway....my point is this: where the hell is a guy that I can be crazy about? I have a suspicion that I may have already met him. It might be Vegas Boy...which is a little terrifying.
Vegas Boy is a guy from high school that I had a massive crush on my senior year. We reconnected in April (thanks to Facebook) and he came down to see me in May. Just the thought of him transports me back to high school and I can feel the same exact feelings I had for him. Wanting a boy that didn't want me back. That was the story of my life back then. At any rate, this guy has something that grabs a hold of me and just won't let go. Maybe it's his sex appeal, maybe it's his personality, his quirks, his laugh, his smile, the way he looks at me...ugh. I think it might just be everything about him. If someone has the ability to break my little heart--it is definitely Vegas Boy. You haven't heard the last about him....I can promise you that!
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